Having a social life is very important. A community of people that support you will benefit you in business and in your personal life. Unfortunately, we’ve reached times where social media and other online interactions have become the preferred way to engage in a social experience. Many people today experience anxiety in a room full of people and don’t really know how to make connections with the people around them.
Whether you’re hanging out with friends, you’re at a party, or just at work; Here are 8 things that you should avoid doing at all costs so you can stay interesting, likable, and approachable.
1. Sit On Your Phone
Nothing says “Don’t bother me”, more than someone immersed in whatever’s going on in their phone.
A lot of people stare into their phone when they are uncomfortable and afraid of being that awkward person at the party that’s not talking to anybody. The reality is, you’re still that awkward person whether you’re looking at your phone, or aren’t.
Instead of looking at your phone, put it away and make conversation with people. The best ice breaker is “Have we met? My name’s…”. Introduce yourself with eye contact and a smile, and your confidence will leave a strong first impression.
2. Closed-Off Body Language
Body language speaks louder than your words do, if your body is positioned in a way that projects detachment from the rest of the room, people will probably not make an effort to approach you. If you’re ever sitting by yourself, here are a few checkpoints to go over mentally.
- Head is up.
- Arms are uncrossed.
- Eyebrows are up.
- You’re slightly smiling (Not too much).
- Your body is turned to face the people in the room.
If you’re sitting far away from everyone. Gravitate toward the people-If you find that no-one wants to talk to you, just inform the host that you must be leaving.
3. Waiting For The Conversation To Come To You
Don’t just sit in the corner of the room waiting for someone to come up to you and start talking. Most people are not initiators. If you want a great social life, you have to be the one to walk around the room and initiate conversation with people. People are drawn to the confidence and if they see that you’re going out of your way to make a conversation, they will probably give you their time.
4. Ignore Random People
Don’t spend your entire time at a social event only talking to the people you know; You could be missing out on getting to know someone very valuable. Especially in a business setting, the more people you know, the better.
If you know more people in the room than the random person does, introduce them to the people you know. Do this, and you will surely come off as confident, kind, and extremely respectable.
5. Break Eye Contact
When having a conversation, make sure not to look around the room, down at your watch, or toward someone else. This will project that you are not interested in what this person is saying, and they will likely move on from you and find someone else that’s interested in what they’re saying.
Keep eye contact and stay engaged in the conversation, even if what they’re saying is boring you.
Never interrupt someone while they are speaking. Even when you think that you have something more funny, or more important to say, wait until they have finished speaking.
One of the most effective ways to make people find you approachable and likable is to let them speak. People want to spend their time with those that make them feel important.
7. Correct People
If you’re having a conversation with someone you’ve just met, don’t correct them. It’s better to just let them be wrong and move on with the conversation. Correcting them could give off the first impression that you’re a know-it-all.
8. Immediately Return The Topic To Yourself
There are times in conversation when it’s perfectly appropriate to spend some time talking about yourself, especially if someone has prompted it by asking you about yourself.
When someone else is talking about themselves however, the polite thing to do is to listen and make commentary relating to them and to what they’re saying. Never reply with a comment that relates to yourself or to a similar situation you’ve had. Wait until they are finished, or until they ask you to relate to them.